Yesterday I knelt
On the ground
In honor of one who lost
His life and surrendered
I multiplied the loss
By thousands for their
Struggle to live with
Their differences
I held prayer and peace
As the seconds wore on
Feeling the infinity of struggle
Surrendering every moment
The horror, the struggle
The pain and terror
I replaced with my breath
And my prayer and my reverence
I reenacted the struggle
With surrender
Surrounded by beings of light
In attendance in action
We are unified as humans
One on this earth
In every color and shape
Everyone birthed
I imagine the fleet of light
Always on call, always alert
Surrounding the surrendering
With comfort and love
I imagine as one who moves
From the struggle to surrender
The surprising peace arrives
With the hands of love
I imagine confusion clears
And understanding appears
As they feel the unexpected arms
Of support surround them
From this side my human eyes
Only see the emotions
That represent lack and fear
Playing out in the world
From inside my heart’s eyes
I see the true picture of humanity
Unclear on life’s purpose
Buying into the lack and fear
Two sides struggling one for control
And the other for surrender
One side bought into the fear and
The other breathing the treetop view
Everyday I use breathe
To remain at my treetop view
While standing in my humanness
Surrendering.
Participants’ Reflections:
There have been times in the last few weeks when we are meditating and I’ve looked at my watch and see ten minutes have gone by. It brings an awareness of what George Floyd went through. Yesterday, the gathering described in the reading drove home the enormity of it. We are hearing about new paradigms re policing. There is hope.
In the reading, I heard “take a knee”. It spoke to me of the importance of pausing. A teacher told me to imagine my head as a helium balloon. I’m aware how I hunch over. I saw a demonstration getting out of hand. And then the chief of police took a knee with the protesters. He was willing to pause. We are all the same people, under the same sky and on the same ground. He diffused the tensions through his act of humility. It is important to remember how powerful prayer is.
I’ve been crying a lot lately, from a compassionate place. I have felt the shift, and I have tears more often. I am experiencing a deeper compassion. This group has helped me be vulnerable and open.
I feel suffering, and am feeling the compassion.
In the reading, I heard the word “surrender”. None will know what Floyd was thinking at the end. I imagine he surrendered. We have to kneel physically or not to be in the moment. He died trying to get breath. I had a terrible trauma in my life. While it was happening, I began to feel calmness, like a still lake; I experienced complete surrender. We forget about that word. But we can’t meditate unless we surrender to the moment. I surrender.
The reading was my process yesterday at the silent gathering. I describe what I believe will happen at that point in my life. I'll be surrounded by loving light. I imagined the loving light was there for him.
In the 12-step program the third step is surrender. I still remember the first time I took that step. It gave me a new life.
Breathing is in the moment. It takes practice to do mindful breathing