I maxed out on adrenalin yesterday
coursing through my veins
Caught up in the day,
focusing too closely on
and feeling so deeply
the pain of the world.
I care so much for everything in this world
I feel so much for everyone in this world
Using my heart to help
Forgetting my limits; my borders.
I lose myself in the fire of life
Engrossed in deep compassion for suffering.
Alarms are sounding and I ignore
Tipping over the edge and still I lean
I consume or be consumed
I jump and then learn to swim
I help and then focus on helping
My tipping point is too far forward
No matter what lessons I walk through
And what learning I glean
I always come back to myself
Accountable to me.
I stopped playing the blame game years ago
Putting down my pointing finger
And holding my heart with acceptance
My choices are my choices
My consequences are my consequences
And I deal with them as they occur
I am not responsible for anyone else
I respond to my needs and uncover my wants
Always without question a problem I perceive
In others is hidden within me.
Always without question what behavior bugs
me is a wound needing healing.
Silence has afforded me the doorway
To communicate with my consequences.
Silence has softened my inner gaze so
I can clearly see all that I am
I no longer wait at my door
with punishment in hand.
I am safe in my own harbor.
I am safe with me.
Coming Back to Ourselves
by Jamie Sams, from Dancing the Dream
"No matter how far we travel in life,
one truth cannot be denied:
we always come back to ourselves.
We cannot change others,
but we can change ourselves and how we view life.
There is no limitation to the journey of the human spirit.
We will find our own individual paths,
and we will always return full circle to our personal truths,
even if those truths have changed as our understanding grew.
We come into our physical lives to experience
the cycles and seasons of human experience,
and we move into another circle of nonphysical experience
when our bodies die.
Tapping the Dream Weave
allows us to understand the unseen circles of energy
that influence and define our waking experiences,
showing us how to come full circle
and how to dance the next level
of our personal growth cycles."
Thank you. That was a great reading, what I needed to hear. A few years ago, I was angry at a friend for doing something. Her behavior upset me. A week later, I found myself doing the exact same thing. I learned that lesson, like you said, that “a problem I perceive in others is hidden within me.” As soon as I look at someone and notice they are doing something I don’t like, I am bound to do it. I learned to not judge people. So as soon as I have that thought, I look inside myself and see how I do that.
Over the past year, there has been more unpleasant behavior. I find myself in the same situation, that I have never been as forgiving and then realizing the pressures that everyone is under. There may be some really bad actors out there, but by and large, it’s other folks going through what we are and manifesting it in regrettable ways.
It falls under the heading ‘you are a part of me I do not yet know.’ That is from an awesome book See No Stranger by Valarie Kaur.
I wanted to thank you all because I realized how much I have grown and learned from this group. How many skills I now have that I didn’t have at the beginning. My son is moving back home. I responded matter-of-fact with acceptance, reassuring him we’d take it one step at a time. Later, I thought of all the problems it will create. This morning I could feel myself getting incredibly overwhelmed, it’s going to be like walking on a goat track for the foreseeable future. And then I remembered feel the fear and do it anyway. And I remembered “I can handle it.” It’s not going to be pleasant. But because of all of you and what I’ve learned about myself, it doesn’t have to become a big drama. You all give me such strength. You are my lodestone. Thank you.
One step at a time and you can take care of yourself. You have that choice every day.
I was thinking of saying to not expect me for the next several days. But then I told myself, I can take 15 minutes each day to take care of myself. 15 minutes. I can be here.
For the first time in my life, I am learning to forgive myself and not be so hard on myself. I still have a ways to go and I have someone wonderful helping me. I’ve tried hard at everything in my life and there were things out of my control. I’m learning I didn’t have the skills at the time. Gradually, I’ve been able to see that with some of it. It’s such a relief to look back and see how I’ve been torturing myself for years. Thank you so much. No matter what, I want to be here every day.
You are your own safe harbor. There may be many doorways and each one, we learn to open up as a safe harbor.
A song won’t let go in my mind. Our Womansong choir sings a song, “I Will Be Your Standing Stone. I Will Stand By You.” In this group, we are each other’s standing stone. Our choir passes stones out to the audience. So I am passing a stone to each of you virtually here today.
Thank you for joining me today. I trust as I find my threads that I follow and find words of inspiration that express my experience, that I can tie into an inspirational poem. It is a joy to share it with you. Thank you for receiving it, for feeling it, because I can see and hear by your presence that you receive it as well. I wish you all a gentle day.