Over the last two days, I spent eight hours in the company of Matt Kahn in a live webinar who was speaking from his home in Central Oregon. He is a living sage teaching wisdom while speaking in trance. He speaks from his own experiences. He speaks of the new spiritual paradigm. He has helped my brain let go of places I’ve been stuck based on teachings from an old spiritual paradigm point of view.
Often what he says is beyond my understanding. Sometimes his words are too much, too fast, too confusing and I continue to welcome them. I feel deeply stirred when I spend time listening to his pre-recorded videos and live webinars.
His words and his energy have helped me feel aligned in my energy body, my mind, my heart and my spirit. Sometimes I sleep while listening and that’s okay because at some level I am gaining comfort and continue to feel aligned. I resonate with him on many levels. I surrender to his teachings. A mystery is at work and it’s a good mystery.
I’m a recovering overachiever. My philosophy has always been if I’m going to do something, I have to do it to the best of my ability. No excuses. At this point in my life I am taking care of me. My accomplishments are behind me. My losses and gains are history. My life book is full of learnings from every experience and I continue to add more.
As I practice living every day, I surrender by easing up on demanding my perfection. I do the best I can in any situation.
As I practice living every day, I surrender my pessimism and remember there is a learning I discover in every experience no matter how difficult or wonderful the experience is.
As I practice living every day, I surrender and align with my heart knowing there is a Universal energy at work in my world.
As I practice living every day, I surrender and accept circumstances that arise, knowing I am a great problem solver and will use my wisdom and skills to get over the next hurdle.
As I practice living every day, I surrender to the love I feel for my family, for friends, for my community and for humanity.
As I practice living every day, I surrender to fear allowing it to bubble up and evaporate without trying to stifle its voice and jam it back down below surface.
As I practice living every day, I surrender my checklist in hand that is judging and assessing the way I act, the way I look, my thoughts, my feelings and my reactions knowing I am doing the best I can. If I abandon my heart, I will find my way back.
As I practice living every day, I surrender and trust my discernment for my choices and my actions. I can make changes to decisions I make. I take responsibility for my actions whether good or bad. I still love me no matter what.
As I practice living every day, I stand in front of my mirror and say namaste, I honor and respect the divine in me.
“In the end it won’t matter what agenda was taken down, whether secrets were unsealed or which perspective had it right on any level. All that will matter is the time you took to remain faithful in spirit, aligned in your ethics, a loving nurturer of your own heart, and inspired contributor for your friends, family and community while rooted in the wisdom of maturity no matter how dark it became before the light dawned.” - Matt Kahn
Thank you so much. I loved what you said about practice. It’s all about practice for me. I used to use the word ‘try’ and it was pointed out to me that try is like ‘I try but I don’t quite get it.’ But practice is like ‘I’m not perfect.’ They talk about perfection, I just keep practicing. And the abandonment thing, that’s huge. I’ve felt abandoned a lot. I recognize it. I abandon myself. First and foremost, I try not to abandon myself. It’s not easy. It’s important to me not to abandon myself.
I was thinking about practice also. I have this whole day in front of me without obligations. I’ve put off doing artwork my whole life. I’ve always been practical, working. Since I was a child, I’ve been taught to be practical like most people. It is so hard at this point to come out of that judgmental state, afraid to make a mistake. I’m going to break it down. If I have a canvas in front of me, I’ll just put a wash on it. No huge plan, no intricate thing that I want to do. Just one little plain step every day. It’s hard to do that, but I’m trying to approach it like a child again, think about color, something simple. That helps. Attending your meditations will help a lot too.
I can hear the gentleness in the tiny steps you are doing. A baby step, holding your own hand while you do it.
I loved the image of letting fear bubble up and evaporate. If you don’t acknowledge it and feel it, it gets stuck and I get stuck. The idea of letting it bubble up and then it evaporates, it’s so useful. There are so many things we can be afraid of, but if we let them bubble up, they will evaporate, at least to some extent.
Giving them a voice so that they are heard; otherwise, they become snarling mountains, from my experience.
I loved the line about learning from every experience no matter how difficult or wonderful the experience is. It’s a good way to look at life. I remember, in my past, I got really depressed and decided I didn’t like being on a rollercoaster of ups and downs. The agony of not getting what I wanted was too hard so I let go of the joys as well. I didn’t care about anything. Acceptance could seem like it’s the same idea, but it’s different. To look at everything as a learning experience: enjoy the wonderfulness and go through the difficult part. Go through both with acceptance and not hang your hat on either one of them. I appreciate the reminder. I’m going to live in acceptance today.
Yesterday, at the end of the Matt Kahn webinar, he sits in silence staring right into my eyes. And he says “I love you” and then there is silence and then he says, “I love you.” He did it about 12 times. I know in my life, I would have been squirming by the fifth time. My mind trying to figure out why he’s saying this? What sense does this make? I could almost hear it in the echo in the back of my mind. But I stayed with it. He says he is repeating it because each time there is another level that is felt, and then another level, and then another level that is felt. It’s incredibly powerful. To be able to receive the words I love you, it was just amazing.
Yesterday’s meditation reading was so soothing and I thank you for it. And thank you for today’s reading. Even though I’m not ready to look in the mirror and say I love you, I can look in the mirror and say ‘I love the divine in me.’ I want to remember it.
I thank you all for being here. I had a horrible day yesterday with a consult I had. But I knew that I felt better yesterday than I would have if I hadn’t come to this group.
Shirley’s interview on Magnetize Love is still available all weekend. It’s a half-hour talk that is so powerful. It’s a podcast from Canada with 21 different interviews with healers.
Shirley’s Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway free webinar is Sunday evening, November 29. It’s a good opportunity to ask Shirley questions about how to deal with your fears. Registration is required.
Thank you. I hope you all have a gentle day. I bless you all. I thank you. Namaste to you, I honor the divine in you as I honor it in myself.