Updated: Oct 2, 2020
In Matt Kahn’s new book entitled, The Universe Always Has a Plan talks about the 10 Golden Rules of the Universe, he says:
“No matter the circumstances you currently face, the solution to each question, concern, or existential crisis is letting go.” …. “Even though it is common for the mind to want to jump in with the most despicable life examples to contradict its wisdom, just feel into it for a moment. What is it like to sit with the knowledge that you’ve done nothing wrong, no matter what others may insist to be true? On an emotional level, even if only a small percentage of you can consider its validity, how does it feel to contemplate you’ve done nothing wrong?”
Considering this seems ludicrous. Especially if your life has been filled with strife, struggle and lack of love. Consider the possibility that your inner wisdom brought you to these experiences to learn about pain and loss, strife, struggle and feelings of neglect.
“If you’re in a physical body, you’re on a spiritual journey.” - Matt Kahn
When you look at life from a bird’s eye view, it has indeed been a journey. You start out learning about life one way and slowly with time and experience, look at it another way.
“You are always going to see each moment from the highest level of consciousness available to you.” - Matt Kahn
As you grow, your level of consciousness changes, new perspectives open, new ideas emerge and you grow. We grow in mind. We grow in body and we grow in heart. We look for good. We strive for love.
It’s important not to have regrets though because regrets keep us stuck in ego’s perception of lack. You did the best you could do with the consciousness you had at the moment. We learn and grow. Anyone who is in a physical body experiences this growth of consciousness. Regrets are a trap to keep you from moving forward. A stall tactic in a way.
This concept is overwhelming for me to grasp and I feel confused. I recognize when I feel overwhelmed and confused, it’s good. My brain is struggling with this new concept and it doesn’t know what to do with it. I don’t insist it accept this concept right now! I pull back and give myself time to assimilate. I relax and get back to what I know. I let the flooding of information reabsorb. Gently with trust I learn. Kindly with patience I deserve. I’ve heard it said many times in this meditation community, I learn better with kindness.
When you find yourself struggling with acceptance and start hammering yourself with your expectations, recognize this and imagine if there was a little child in front of you struggling with acceptance. Would you take them by the shoulders and shake them? Would you scream accusations in their face demanding they comply? This may have been done to you by a wounded adult, but you’re in charge now. Embrace the child and be gentle.
One day you finally knew what you had to do, and began, though the voices around you kept shouting their bad advice- though the whole house began to tremble and you felt the old tug at your ankles. "Mend my life!" each voice cried. But you didn't stop. You knew what you had to do, though the wind pried with its stiff fingers at the very foundations, though their melancholy was terrible. It was already late enough, and a wild night, and the road full of fallen branches and stones. But little by little, as you left their voices behind, the stars began to burn through the sheets of clouds, and there was a new voice which you slowly recognized as your own, that kept you company as you strode deeper and deeper into the world, determined to do the only thing you could do- determined to save
I loved the reading. My monkey mind was very active this morning and I took a different perspective on it. In our family, the word “monkey” is a term of endearment. During the meditation, I tried to rein in my monkey, and then I decided, why not be kind to my monkey and see if my monkey would come sit with me and meditate with me. My cute little monkey stayed with me and every once in a while, he would go running off and my mind would go crazy and I’d say, no, come on back. It was a fun visual.
The reading was beautiful. The idea of self-forgiveness, that’s what I got out of this. Not beating yourself up for regrets. The bird’s eye view. Thinking about standing on a mountain and seeing below. Everything looks so small. It’s all about perspective. Not beating yourself up. Regrets are a trap because you’re living in the past. I think the bottom line is that, at that moment in time, we did the very best we could with what we knew and the skill set we had. That can be woven into forgiveness for others. People don’t wake up and say they will be abused.
The reading, my writing and Matt Kahn’s words, may be a different concept, but think of them as seeds that have been watered. An amazingly loving concept.
I’m doing a talk on spiritual practices tonight trying to get people to practice with me this fall. I started thinking about what the benefits are, so that I could motivate people to do it. I thought about it. I’m calmer, more energized. In today’s meditation, I got the idea that I am feeling more intuitive; meditating makes inner knowing more available.
I believe the inner knowing comes from the practice of silence.
We meditate and then we come back to the present. Kahn says to live in the now, there is no past or future. The past was a series of nows that happened back then. The future will be nows that happen in moments. When doing any kind of meditation, on a walk I can be stopped by a blade of grass, or a patch of dirt, and be reminded of the moment I played with marbles in the dirt. There is joy in each moment when we make those moments the now.
I heard the “flooding of information absorbed.” That’s what it is like here every morning, a flood of feelings of growth. It’s very overwhelming, but good, quite an experience. Thank you.
I was struck by the end of the Mary Oliver poem, about leaving the voices and the stars shining through, and hearing her own voice. During the meditation, I started to go in to try to amplify that voice. Quieting the monkey mind. And what's the real voice? What’s that voice of connection? Doing this practice, the monkey mind is quieting, my own voice is getting stronger. And I realized it wasn’t just the voices of criticism, it was also the voices saying I’m fine because I go for the applause. It’s as addictive for me as is the criticism. It’s finding the place in the middle. To see me not grandiose and unique, and that I’m not the dirt of earth, I just am. That is what I took out of it.
Much gratitude. During the meditation, I noticed a cacophony of birds, and I tried to come back to my breath. And then I thought I could be part of the birds and it expanded me. I have trouble being in my body, and I brought myself back to my body and then expanded with the birds. I have gratitude.
I remember someone said I must have been bad in a previous life for all these bad things to happen to me. That’s a terrible thing to hear. I certainly hope that’s not true, and I refuse to think about it though I remember it. During the meditation, there are many tragedies. It’s difficult to watch someone suffer. Having patience comes easily to me and I’m grateful for that. When I have the opportunity and timing is right, I’ve been able to help others by being empathetic and listening and understanding. Yesterday, I saw my red squirrel friend run up the tree, then there was a light rain and she was nibbling away. It was so beautiful, so glad for these moments of nature. I can rest in it.
I liked the line “consider that you've done nothing wrong.” I picture that little girl, yell at her and shake her or love her and encourage her. Most of my life, I've been told I'm wrong. For years, I’ve been changing that. I’ve tried to just accept the monkey mind and love that part. Our minister said, if you had child, would you let him burn in hell or love him. Being so hard on myself. This all supports that.