Updated: Sep 27, 2020
As I age, I grow wisdom
I find more space in my head
Of awareness in my choices,
Actions and thoughts
I’ve done nothing special
To earn the wisdom I hold
Except to live in extremes of
Pain and joy and act as witness.
I have always been told I need
Thicker skin, to lighten up,
To smile more, to chill out
That I feel too much.
I am a granola head,
I think too much
That I need to relax
Not care so much.
Each criticism I embodied and
Brought close to my heart
I demanded myself to comply but
my demands faded into nonconformance.
Over and over I would struggle to comply
To be accepted, to be approved.
One little comment set my teeth on edge
And I found myself in my corner again.
As I age it doesn’t matter
How much I conform because I take time to
see who I am and now agree I am
who I am supposed to be.
I don’t know if I would have looked so deeply
Inside to figure out why I do what I do
And believe what I believe if it wasn’t
For the criticizers who demanded I be different.
My parents gave me the biggest gift